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CHAPTER
I
ON
THE MANNER OF LIVING OF A VIRTUOUS WOMAN, AND OF HER BEHAVIOUR
DURING THE ABSENCE OF HER HUSBAND
A VIRTUOUS woman, who has affection for her husband, should
act in conformity with his wishes as if he were a divine being,
and with his consent should take upon herself the whole care
of his family. She should keep the whole house well cleaned,
and arrange flowers of various kinds in different parts of
it, and make the floor smooth and polished so as to give the
whole a neat and becoming appearance. She should surround
the house with a garden, and place ready in it all the materials
required for the morning, noon and evening sacrifices. Moreover
she should herself revere the sanctuary of the Household Gods,
for, says Gonardiya, `nothing so much attracts the heart of
a householder to his wife as a careful observance of the things
mentioned above'.
Towards the parents, relations, friends, sisters, and servants
of her husband she should behave as they deserve. In the
garden she should plant beds of green vegetables, bunches
of the sugar cane, and clumps of the fig tree, the mustard
plant, the parsley plant, the fennel plant, and the xanthochymus
pictorius. Clusters of various flowers such as the trapa
bispinosa, the jasmine, the jasminum grandiflorum, the yellow
amaranth, the wild jasmine, the tabernamontana coronaria,
the nadyaworta, the china rose and others, should likewise
be planted, together with the fragrant grass andropogon
schaenanthus, and the fragrant root of the plant andropogon
miricatus. She should also have seats and arbours made in
the garden, in the middle of which a well, tank, or pool
should be dug.
The wife should always avoid the company of female beggars,
female Buddhist mendicants, unchaste and roguish women,
female fortune tellers and witches. As regards meals she
should always consider what her husband likes and dislikes
and what things are good for him, and what are injurious
to him. When she hears the sounds of his footsteps coming
home she should at once get up and be ready to do whatever
he may command her, and either order her female servant
to wash his feet, or wash them herself. When going anywhere
with her husband, she should put on her ornaments, and without
his consent she should not either give or accept invitations,
or attend marriages and sacrifices, or sit in the company
of female friends, or visit the temples of the Gods. And
if she wants to engage in any kind of games or sports, she
should not do it against his will. In the same way she should
always sit down after him, and get up before him, and should
never awaken him when he is asleep. The kitchen should be
situated in a quiet and retired place, so as not to be accessible
to strangers, and should always look clean.
In the event of any misconduct on the part of her husband,
she should not blame him excessively, though she be a little
displeased. She should not use abusive language towards
him, but rebuke him with conciliatory words, whether he
be in the company of friends or alone. Moreover, she should
not be a scold, for, says Gonardiya, `there is no cause
of dislike on the part of a husband so great as this characteristic
in a wife'. Lastly she should avoid bad expressions, sulky
looks, speaking aside, standing in the doorway, and looking
at passers-by, conversing in the pleasure groves, and remaining
in a lonely place for a long time; and finally she should
always keep her body, her teeth, her hair and everything
belonging to her tidy, sweet, and clean.
When the wife wants to approach her husband in private her
dress should consist of many ornaments, various kinds of
flowers, and a cloth decorated with different colours, and
some sweet-smelling ointments or unguents. But her everyday
dress should be composed of a thin, close-textured cloth,
a few ornaments and flowers, and a little scent, not too
much. She should also observe the fasts and vows of her
husband, and when he tries to prevent her doing this, she
should persuade him to let her do it.
At appropriate times of the year, and when they happen to
be cheap, she should buy earth, bamboos, firewood, skins,
and iron pots, as also salt and oil. Fragrant substances,
vessels made of the fruit of the plant wrightea antidysenterica,
or oval leaved wrightea, medicines, and other things which
are always wanted, should be obtained when required and
kept in a secret place of the house. The seeds of the radish,
the potato, the common beet, the Indian wormwood, the mango,
the cucumber, the egg plant, the kushmanda, the pumpkin
gourd, the surana, the bignonia indica, the sandal wood,
the premna spinosa, the garlic plant, the onion, and other
vegetables, should be bought and sown at the proper seasons.
The wife, moreover, should not tell to strangers the amount
of her wealth, nor the secrets which her husband has confided
to her. She should surpass all the women of her own rank
in life in her cleverness, her appearance, her knowledge
of cookery, her pride, and her manner of serving her husband.
The expenditure of the year should be regulated by the profits.
The milk that remains after the meals should be turned into
ghee or clarified butter. Oil and sugar should be prepared
at home; spinning and weaving should also be done there;
and a store of ropes and cords, and barks of trees for twisting
into ropes should be kept. She should also attend to the
pounding and cleaning of rice, using its small grain and
chaff in some way or other. She should pay the salaries
of the servants, look after the tilling of the fields, and
keeping of the flocks and herds, superintend the making
of vehicles, and take care of the rams, cocks, quails, parrots,
starlings, cuckoos, peacocks, monkeys, and deer; and finally
adjust the income and expenditure of the day. The worn-out
clothes should be given to those servants who have done
good work, in order to show them that their services have
been appreciated, or they may be applied to some other use.
The vessels in which wine is prepared, as well as those
in which it is kept, should be carefully looked after, and
put away at the proper time. All sales and purchases should
also be well attended to. The friends of her husband she
should welcome by presenting them with flowers, ointment,
incense, betel leaves, and betel nut. Her father-in-law
and mother-in-law she should treat as they deserve, always
remaining dependent on their will, never contradicting them,
speaking to them in few and not harsh words, not laughing
loudly in their presence, and acting with their friends
and enemies as with her own. In addition to the above she
should not be vain, or too much taken up with her enjoyments.
She should be liberal towards her servants, and reward them
on holidays and festivals; and not give away anything without
first making it known to her husband.
Thus ends the manner of living of a virtuous woman.
During the absence of her husband on a journey the virtuous
woman should wear only her auspicious ornaments, and observe
the fasts in honour of the Gods. While anxious to hear the
news of her husband, she should still look after her household
affairs. She should sleep near the elder women of the house,
and make herself agreeable to them. She should look after
and keep in repair the things that are liked by her husband,
and continue the works that have been begun by him. To the
abode of her relations she should not go except on occasions
of joy and sorrow, and then she should go in her usual travelling
dress, accompanied by her husband's servants, and not remain
there for a long time. The fasts and feasts should be observed
with the consent of the elders of the house. The resources
should be increased by making purchases and sales according
to the practice of the merchants and by means of honest
servants, superintended by herself. The income should be
increased, and the expenditure diminished as much possible.
And when her husband returns from his journey, she should
receive him at first in her ordinary clothes, so that he
may know in what way she has lived during his absence, and
should bring to him some presents, as also materials for
the worship of the Deity.
Thus ends the part relating to the behaviour of a wife during
the absence of her husband on a journey.
There are also some verses on the subject as follows:
`The wife, whether she be a woman of noble family, or a
virgin widow1 remarried, or a concubine,
should lead a chaste life, devoted to her husband, and doing
everything for his welfare. Women acting thus acquire Dharma,
Artha, and Kama, obtain a high position, and generally keep
their husbands devoted to them.
Footnotes
- 1
- This probably refers to a girl married
in her infancy, or when very young and whose husband had
died before she arrived at the age of puberty. Infant
marriages are still the common custom of the Hindoos.
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