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CHAPTER
II
OF
LIVING LIKE A WIFE
WHEN a courtesan is living as a wife with her lover,
she should behave like a chaste woman, and do everything
to his satisfaction. Her duty in this respect, in
short, is, that she should give him pleasure, but
should not become attached to him, though behaving
as if she were really attached.
Now the following is the manner in which she is
to conduct herself, so as to accomplish the above
mentioned purpose. She should have a mother dependent
on her, one who should be represented as very harsh,
and who looked upon money as her chief object in
life. In the event of there being no mother, then
an old and confidential nurse should play the same
role. The mother or nurse, on their part, should
appear to be displeased with the lover, and forcibly
take her away from him. The woman herself should
always show pretended anger, dejection, fear, and
shame on this account, but should not disobey the
mother or nurse at any time.
She should make out to the mother or nurse that
the man is suffering from bad health, and making
this a pretext for going to see him, she should
go on that account. She is, moreover, to do the
following things for the purpose of gaining the
man's favour:
Sending her female attendant to bring the flowers
used by him on the previous day, in order that she
may use them herself as a mark of affection, also
asking for the mixture of betel nut and leaves that
have remained uneaten by him; expressing wonder
at his knowledge of sexual intercourse, and the
several means of enjoyment used by him; learning
from him the sixty-four kinds of pleasure mentioned
by Babhravya; continually practising the ways of
enjoyment as taught by him, and according to his
liking; keeping his secrets; telling him her own
desires and secrets; concealing her anger; never
neglecting him on the bed when he turns his face
towards her; touching any parts of his body according
to his wish; kissing and embracing him when he is
asleep; looking at him with apparent anxiety when
he is wrapt in thought, or thinking of some other
subject than herself; showing neither complete shamelessness,
nor excessive bashfulness when he meets her, or
sees her standing on the terrace of her house from
the public road; hating his enemies; loving those
who are dear to him; showing a liking for that which
he likes; being in high or low spirits according
to the state that he is in himself; expressing a
curiosity to see his wives; not continuing her anger
for a long time; suspecting even the marks and wounds
made by herself with. her nails and teeth on his
body to have been made by some other woman; keeping
her love for him unexpressed by words, but showing
it by deeds, and signs, and hints; remaining silent
when he is asleep, intoxicated, or sick; being very
attentive when he describes his good actions, and
reciting them afterwards to his praise and benefit;
giving witty replies to him if he be sufficiently
attached to her; listening to all his stories, except
those that relate to her rivals; expressing feelings
of dejection and sorrow if he sighs, yawns, or falls
down; pronouncing the words `live long' when he
sneezes; pretending to be ill, or to have the desire
of pregnancy, when she feels dejected; abstaining
from praising the good qualities of anybody else,
and from censuring those who possess the same faults
as her own man; wearing anything that may have been
given to her by him; abstaining from putting on
her ornaments, and from taking food when he is in
pain, sick, low-spirited, or suffering from misfortune,
and condoling and lamenting with him over the same;
wishing to accompany him if he happens to leave
the country himself or if he be banished from it
by the king; expressing a desire not to live after
him; telling him that the whole object and desire
of her life was to be united with him; offering
previously promised sacrifices to the Deity when
he acquires wealth, or has some desire fulfilled,
or when he has recovered from some illness or disease;
putting on ornaments every day; not acting too freely
with him; reciting his name and the name of his
family in her songs placing his hand on her loins,
bosom and forehead, and falling asleep after feeling
the pleasure of his touch; sitting on his lap and
falling asleep there; wishing to have a child by
him; desiring not to live longer than he does; abstaining
from revealing his secrets to others; dissuading
him from vows and fasts by saying `let the sin fall
upon me'; keeping vows and fasts along with him
when it is impossible to change his mind on the
subject; telling him that vows and fasts are difficult
to be observed, even by herself, when she has any
dispute with him about them; looking on her own
wealth and his without any distinction; abstaining
from going to public assemblies without him, and
accompanying him when he desires her to do so; taking
delight in using things previously used by him,
and in eating food that he has left uneaten; venerating
his family, his disposition, his skill in the arts,
his learning, his caste, his complexion, his native
country, his friends, his good qualifies, his age,
and his sweet temper; asking him to sing, and to
do other such like things, if able to do them; going
to him without paying any regard to fear, to cold,
to heat, or to rain; saying with regard to the next
world that he should be her lover even there; adapting
her tastes, disposition and actions to his liking;
abstaining from sorcery; disputing continually with
her mother on the subject of going to him, and,
when forcibly taken by her mother to some other
place, expressing her desire to die by taking poison,
by starving herself to death, by stabbing herself
with some weapon, or by hanging herself; and lastly
assuring the man of her constancy and love by means
of her agents, and receiving money herself, but
abstaining from any dispute with her mother with
regard to pecuniary matters.
When the man sets out on a journey, she should make
him swear that he will return quickly, and in his
absence should put aside her vows of worshipping
the Deity, and should wear no ornaments except those
that are lucky. If the time fixed for his return
has passed, she should endeavour to ascertain the
real time of his return from omens, from the reports
of the people, and from the positions of the planets,
the moon and the stars. On occasions of amusement,
and of auspicious dreams, she should say `Let me
be soon united to him.' If, moreover, she feels
melancholy, or sees any inauspicious omen, she should
perform some rite to appease the Deity.
When the man does return home she should worship
the God Kama', and offer oblations to other Deities,
and having caused a pot filled with water to be
brought by her friends, she should perform the worship
in honour of the crow who eats the offerings which
we make to the manes of deceased relations. After
the first visit is over she should ask her lover
also to perform certain rites, and this he will
do if he is sufficiently attached to her.
Now a man is said to be sufficiently attached to
a woman when his love is disinterested; when he
has the same object in view as his beloved one;
when he is quite free from any suspicions on her
account; and when he is indifferent to money with
regard to her.
Such is the manner of a courtesan living with a
man like a wife, and set forth here for the sake
of guidance from the rules of Dattaka. What is not
laid down here should be practised according to
the custom of the people, and the nature of each
individual man.
There are also two verses on the subject as follows:
`The extent of the love of women is not known, even
to those who are the objects of their affection,
on account of its subtlety, and on account of the
avarice, and natural intelligence of womankind.'
`Women are hardly ever known in their true light,
though they may love men, or become indifferent
towards them, may give them delight, or abandon
them, or may extract from them all the wealth that
they may possess.
Footnotes
- 1
- Kama, i.e. the Indian Cupid.
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